Today In Disney-Related Pet Peeves

So, there's this YouTube ad that is playing before practically everything for me, from some financial planning group^ and it's laying it on super thick about what a devoted Dad this guy is and so of course he uses this particular mutual fund because OF COURSE. But they open the ad with this line as to how his life revolves around his daughters:

"I know the name of eight princesses..."

WELL THEN, let's check out Mr. Father of the Year over here! Mr. Shill-For-Some-Mutual-Fund knows the name of EIGHT princesses!! What rapt attention he must pay to every aspect of his daughter's lives and interests, and how involved he must be to know the names of eight whole princesses!!


  • 1) Snow White
  • 2) Cinderella
  • 3) Aurora
  • 3.5) Briar Rose
  • 4) Ariel
  • 5) Belle
  • 6) Jasmine
  • 7) Pocahontas
  • 8) Mulan
  • 9) Tiana
  • 10) Rapunzel
  • 11) Merida
  • 12) Elsa (for at least the first part of the film)
  • 13) Anna
  • and that's not even getting in to the more obscure ones like:

  • 14) Eilonwy
  • 15) Nala
  • 16) Megara (if Mulan gets to be a princess Meg should more than qualify!)
  • 17) Kida
  • 18) Giselle
  • 19) Vanellope
  • 20) Tiger Lily

Knowing the names of eight princesses is not being a devoted father to young daughters (assuming said daughters are into princesses, which his are). Knowing the names of eight princesses is being vaguely aware of the fact that you both have children and a DVD player.

And not only that, now that I've watched the whole ad to write this (rather than just the first 5 seconds I had to sit through before I could skip it like I always do), it turns out that not only is this guy supposed to be a devoted Dad, he's a devoted SINGLE Dad. Yes, that's right, ladies and gentlemen! It's truly extraordinary circumstances that would lead any father to be able to name between 40 and 61% of his daughters' favorite characters that absolutely, totally wouldn't happen if that other gender of parent were around to pay attention to it for him!

I can't even.

^ apparently it's MassMutual, and the ad is here if you want to see it for yourself, although of course I don't recommend it:

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About the Author

Satiricalifragilistic grew up during the Disney Renaissance, and The Little Mermaid was the first movie she ever saw in theaters at age 3. Her mother flatly refused to let her leave the theater when Ursula got huge and terrifying, and maybe that explains her troubled psyche.

While she'll admit to being an inveterate nitpicker, she firmly believes in loving a piece of art even while criticizing it, and in the importance of engaging critically with what she loves. She has special contempt for anyone who tries to claim the politics in Disney films don't matter because "they're just movies," because she knows exactly how much the Disney Canon influenced her little gradeschool self—for good and for ill!

She loves art, design, music, dancing, movies from Hollywood's Golden Age, and British comedy...expect a lot of these to turn up in her reviews and mashups!